10 subtle signs that a girl really likes you - Hoy Actual (2023)

Never again misunderstand her intentions.

Flirting with women can be more intimidating than ever these days, and it can seem impossible to tell if a girl likes you or not. Even Hollywood hunk Henry Cavill caused a lot of controversy in a recent interview when he said that in today's socio-political climate he hesitates to approach women for fear of being seen as a mean person.

I'm glad we're encouraging more women to take the lead in their dating lives. But some men and women are more traditional and prefer the man to go first. Women send out all sorts of signals to indicate that they are interested, but it's not always easy to decipher what they mean, especially when people's perception is faulty. How to distinguish a friendly smile from an encouraging one? How do you know if a woman is flirting with you or just laughing at your jokes? Honestly, how do you know if a girl likes you?

To help you sort out these signals, we've compiled a list of things women admit they do to get a guy's attention — so you'll always know how to tell if a girl likes you. And guys, if you want to increase your chances of getting a "yes" when you ask a girl out, read 15 little things men do that women find irresistible.

1
they are close to you

A good rule of thumb for how to tell if a girl really likes you is to consider the context. If a woman is standing very close to you in a crowded bar, she probably just wants to talk, not shout. However, if you're in an environment with an acceptable noise level and a fairly large space, and she's still leaning against you, chances are she wants you to invite her out. Stamp one of the 17 worst things men say to women to make sure you don't shoot yourself in the foot.

2
she pats you on the shoulder

Likewise, if a girl grabs your arm to keep from falling as she stumbles over her heels, you probably shouldn't know too much about it. But if you're sitting at the table and a woman says something like, "Oh, Brett, you're such a sweetheart," and gives you a short squeeze on your arm, it's a clear sign that she's interested.

3
she compliments your dress
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One of the best ways to tell if a girl likes you is to master the way women are taught to express their attractiveness. Dating coach Matthew Hussey explains in his best-selling book How to Get a Man that in the Victorian era, if a woman was walking in the park and saw a man she wanted to get to know better, she would drop her handkerchief on the ground and keep walking, thus inviting him to pick up he gave it to her and returned it to her and talked.

One of the secrets of Hussey's modern approach to the "handkerchief" is complimenting men's clothing. If a close friend or co-worker tells you they love your new shirt, it probably doesn't matter much. But if you're wondering how to tell if a girl likes you and you're waiting for a drink at the bar and a random girl says, "That's a nice sweater," she's likely to drop her handkerchief on the floor.

5
she gives you a "look"

In the same chapter, Hussey points out that most men are clueless when it comes to mastering body language. So he tells women that it's not enough for a guy to quickly scan the room, because for all he knows, he's probably looking for the bathroom or scanning the room. He advises women to look twice, once every half a second to look him in the eye, then look away, then look again and smile. Whether she's read the book or not, when a woman does this at a party or bar, it's almost a sure sign that she wants you to come over and talk to her.

6
focuses on you

Well, let's say you've taken the first critical step and now you're talking to a woman, but you're not sure if she wants it. A sure way to tell if he's feeling the vibe is to notice if he's giving you his full attention. If she checks her phone or glances at her friends, she may be trying to show she's not interested without having to say it outright.

But considering we're all addicted to social media these days, if a woman doesn't check her phone once every 30 minutes, that means she's at least busy enough that you should feel safe asking if you should continue the conversation and drink sometimes.

7
she wants you to teach her something

Women who know dating know that asking a man to teach a woman a new skill makes them feel more masculine, boosting their self-esteem and testosterone levels. Asking you to teach her archery or coding is a great way to show that she's willing to spend more time with you than directly asking for a date.

8
talk about sex

This also needs to be considered in context. I write a lot about sex, so I often talk about oral sex with men the way anthropologists discuss the mating rituals of exotic tribes, and men get it wrong more than once. But many women are reluctant to talk openly about sex. If you're alone and she's secretly using all sorts of sexual innuendo and innuendo, she's probably trying to piss you off. Even for me, there's a big difference between summarizing a study I conducted with a group of male friends on why it's important to have sex before training, and vividly describing what I've learned from vaginal orgasm classes to dating. When the guy I like asks how my day was and I say I just bought a new pair of knee socks and some underwear, I know exactly what I'm doing.

9
flirt sms

On the one hand, texting isn't good because you can't read the tone and you don't have the body language to go on. Texting, on the other hand, has a very clear flirting manual. If he sends you a selfie, comes back to your messages, and asks you a few more questions, that's probably a surefire way to tell if a girl likes you. After all, no one cares what sandwich you eat for lunch unless it has a romantic charm to it. If he sends you an emoji like , he throws a tissue in your face. For expert tips on making your virtual connection easier, check out I Hired an Online Dating Coach and Here's What I Learned.

10
say yes dat

This should be a telltale sign that a girl likes you, but here's why she doesn't. Many women grow up thinking they have to "play hard" to "lure" a guy because men love the chase. This is why many men believe that if a woman refuses or avoids dating, it may be a sign that she needs to "try harder." This is an easy way to get into trouble as it can be hard to tell if a woman is truly uninterested, especially via text or just playing games. Research shows that trying to get it doesn't work anyway, and considering the problems it can cause, it's better not to risk it. No one will blame you for asking a woman out on a date on the right occasion (i.e. not if you are her boss or either of you are married). But if he says no, it's best to politely forgive yourself and forget about it. There are still plenty of fish in the sea!

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